January 2011
28 posts
why is it called the giant panda?is there some...
If you lick, suck, or bite on my neck prepare to...
and ear
having sex is a pain reliever 10x more powerful...
that shit is for real.SCIENCE
girlfriends make
me want to write poetry.always have.not even necessarily love poems or sad poems but they bring this sense of creativity and words just come easier.its been too long since ive written and while taking a pee and piecing words together in my head i came out with the illest set.in my head it sounded all def poetry jam and i tried to just say it out loud and nnnnnaaaaaaahhhh not gonna cut it
I love my hands
They do so many good things for me;right and left.but most important is keep me company when I’m alone,make me feel hot when I feel ugly,and whose energetic philanges furiously type away as I lay depressed in bed.hot damn.
Cant fucking argue
Professor: You are a Christian, aren’t you, son?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Professor: Is God good?
Student: Sure.
Professor: My brother died of cancer, even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn’t. How is God good, then? Hmm?
(Student was silent)
Professor: You can’t answer, can you? Let’s start again, young fella. Is God good?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Is Satan good?
Student: No.
Professor: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From.. God.
Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student: Yes.
Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student: Yes.
Professor: So who created evil?
(Student didn’t answer)
Professor: Is there sickness? Immortality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, who created them?
(Student had no answer)
Professor: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son.. have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your God.
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God, for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.
Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?
Student: Yes.
Professor: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, Science says your God doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor: Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Professor: Yes.
Student: And is there such a thing as Cold?
Professor: Yes.
Student: No, sir, there isn’t.
(The Lecture Theatre became very quiet with this turn of events)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of Heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There was a pon-drop silence in the Lecture Theatre)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?
Student: You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light… But if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and it’s called Darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, You would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?
Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed.
Professor: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Professor: If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?
(The class was in uproar)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?
(The class broke out into laughter)
Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? .. No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable and Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures?
(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable)
Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student: That is it, sir.. exactly! The link between man and God is Faith. That is all that keeps things alive and moving!
Best website EVAR →
i just watched all the epicmeatime episodes and im...
porn aaaaaall day
A twin for two
After sharing a twin size bed with you for a week,being back home alone in a queen size feels so lonely:/ I hate that i have room to move around,that i get cold cuz youre not laying with limbs sprawled over me,that i wake up to a dark room and not your bright smile.How is it that its been 4 days and i miss like its been 4 months :(
Call me pathetic
Women wanna be treated like princesses in life but...
hmmmmm ive heard this but noooooot too sure about its validity.thoughts????plausible,confirmed,or busted
Back from a week in santa barbara.
i’ll blog about that shit later.its long as fuck.but i got sick the last few days and now im home……sick -____-
alright sons and daughters
ive wanted to go to italy like my whole life and i found out that i can go for a week and a half with hotel and train fare between Florence,Venice,Rome,Milan,and Tuscany all for about a grand.that includes flight there too.mother fucker i WANNNA GO.oh shit i forgot………………………im a broke ass mofo =____= this is bullshivik.do i blame the shiity...
What I've learned from Jersey Shore:
Freah the fuck out when anyone calls you fake.
Kimmi: J.K Rowling vs J.R.R Tolkein. →
kimmismiles:
Inb4 CRAZY HP fans rage.
So, I marathoned the Lord of the Rings trilogy (and I have read the books) today with a few friends. It REALLY made me realise how much J.K ripped off Tolkien. I mean she’s an excellent author, but there are just too many similarities between scenes, characters and ideas…
Damn days
So I was redoing my dry-erase calender and I have come to a realization.I still have no idea which months have 30 or 31 days.Effin poem doesn’t help at all -__-
I can't brag about my love for God because I fail...